Spewing Thoughts

You know the phrase if you want some done right you better do it yourself? Well I'm learning that phrase the hard-way tonight. I run a video game blog called Your Health is Low and it's really taking off. The only hitch I and other video game blogs run into is that the writers are not writing. It seems the idea of writing for a video game blog was a nice idea in theory but having to write and my writers head for the hills. I for one don't have the best writing skills on the planet but I do like to express my feelings about things to others in written form. I mean I could do other forms of expression for what gives me life and passion but that's another tale. I know anything worth doing won't come easy and will be worth the hardships. But I'm trying to lead by example and I think instead I am sending the message since I can do it all what does he need us for. Ah fuck now it sounds like this post is all about bitching.

On the weather front, my little mountain community is getting dumped with snow. With really no end in site. To me this is great news. I love the cold, rain and snow. When I went walking to the post office today (in the snow), I looked around at the beautiful trees and ground painted a new color for this day. It felt as if someone pull out a brush and decided to add a clean white blanket over the trees and ground. With each crunch of my shoes in the ground, I looked all around to the show that was unfolding before me. The wind at times picking up and blowing the snow flakes all around and on me of course. But really it was a beautiful walk. Minus walking up the steep hill back home.

I'm sitting in my room listening to Owl City finishing up the top 10 list for the gaming blog and my mind wanders off to the opposite sex I swore off. I look around and see people who are happy and content with the person they found and can't wait to marry them. Me? I've just gotten used to being single and excepting my life as a man who will spend his nights alone. Oh yes people say this and that about me but the truth is I've rolled the dice on my life and I've crapped out several times. Only a idiot would want to be with me. Were would we live my parents house? lol exactly. I find it funny how people think of me as a moron. Like the words coming out of their mouth I hadn't considered them. Of course I want a full time job, of course I want a college degree, of course I want my drivers license, these people seem to think I just sit in a hole and do nothing and say aww well such is life I wasn't magically given these things so I'll never get them. It's at these times I practice patience for my fellow man spouting their ignorance because they aren't me. They haven't tired and with every attempt at the little things only to fail. I think that's why I've grown ok with living the life of a loser. It's working! I mean I've been a rock and the man who spouts don't give up, but really I think my soul is damned. Mostly by my own accord I think. So am I complaining about my life? No I'm content right now. I just wish I was in love with the girl who I'm supposed to be with and working, with a college degree under my belt. But I don't have those things, so such is life. I know very French of me.

So back to my Owl City and writing in my blog that I keep going. Why the hell did I write this. I bet if I was analyzing myself I would say because you're a twat who is bitching and needs to purge this girl part of you.